Sit Down Already!!!

Eating Together.
It matters. Could anything be more simple? It matters when our children are small and it matters when they become teenagers. A family dinner is important to instill good eating habits, for social interaction and for strengthening family ties. It's a time to communicate about the day. It's a time to reflect and renew. It's a time to give thanks. It's a time to be together.

Let me take this family dining idea a step further. I read alot about "just grab a pizza or a bucket of chicken, but sit down together." Certainly with all the activities and practices and events in the life of a family, drive-thru's and fast food are often the only options. I may be old-fashioned but sometimes "sitting down to dinner" should be more than a paper sack and squeeze packets of catsup. "Eating Right" is difficult with food to go. Eating Out is expensive! And "nothing says lovin' like something from your oven", right?

It takes a plan but our families are worth it. Casseroles can be made and frozen over the weekend. On Sunday, Dad can charcoal not only steaks but chicken breasts, pork chops and hamburgers for the rest of the week. Baked potatoes from the microwave, broiled tomatoes and a bag'o'salad with extra veggies make a meal. Try baked apples with the pork, whole wheat pasta tossed with fresh Parmesan and garlic butter and spinach salad from a sack with bacon bits, Durkee's onions rings, hard boiled eggs and Catalina dressing. Make fajitas out of the chicken breasts. Throw the peppers and onions on the grill (on foil) and then just wrap up. Shred the chicken and rewarm with the vegetables. Serve with flour tortillas. Hamburgers, baked beans and potato salad from the deli, fresh fruit and chips. Bingo. Four nights of meals.

Take dinner with your family one more step. Set the table. Use real napkins. Add candles or fresh flowers sometimes. Recognize a good grade, a soccer score or passing a driver's test. Celebrate the little things. Celebrate the big things. Enjoy being together.

Every once in a while, how about pulling out your wedding china? If those dishes just stay tucked away, our children will not associate them with anything "family." Aren't those darlings we love most of all worth the "good stuff"? And don't we want them to appreciate beautiful things, ...and know which fork to use when they have dinner with the President? ( a favorite Wagner reason to use their manners).

Turn off the TV, don't pick up the phone, and keep the conversation positive. Dinnertime is NOT the time to argue, chastise or pull rank. A study by Columbia University has found that teens whose families eat together are less likely to abuse drugs and alcohol. They also have less stress, better grades and -- perhaps most importantly -- better relationships with us! Dinner around a table grounds our children, gives them a sense of who they are, and is the way to nurture and love them.

Here's one of those dishes you can make ahead and freeze. It is similar to Beth's at Harmony House and is a Wagner family favorite. It is good with rice and a grapefruit and avacado salad with Martinique Poppy Seed Dressing. Note: An easy way to jazz up rice is to brown every 1 cup rice (dry) in 5 tbsps melted butter. Transfer to casserole. Substitute chicken or beef broth for the water. Throw in some slivered almonds if you're feeling frisky. Bake, covered, at 325 for about 45 minutes or until done.


Swiss Chicken Casserole
1 T butter or margarine
1 cup milk
4 boneless chicken breasts
salt and pepper
8 slices swiss cheese
1 pkg stuffing mix
1 can mushroom soup
Melt butter in casserole dish. Add Chicken Breasts, cover with swiss cheese. Mix soup and milk and pour over chicken and cheese. S and P to taste. Mix stuffing according to package directions and put on top of casserole. Can be frozen at this point. When ready to bake: Bake, still covered, at 325 degrees for 1 1/2 hours or until bubbly. Serves four generously.

Newest favorite dessert- Weight Watching friend shared this at a meeting and everyone loved it.  Google fr exact calories and fats but it is yummy and certainly less than traditional cake recipes.
1 box spice cake  (some say chocolate works great)
1 can pumpkin puree
1/2 cup water
beat well and pour into a greased 9 by 11 pan or muffin tins (it will be thick)
bake at 350 for 25- 30 minutes or muffins, 15 to 18 minutes.
Serve with lite Cool Whip
I  substitututed orange juice for the water and added pumpkin pie spice
with chocolate, try strong coffee instead of water
chrissie

Keys to Success

Sandra DuPont, family counselor and contributor on the web newspaper, Huff Post, shares her advice with parents on helping teens to have academic success. She offers a simple outline to get your teen on the road to excellence in high school.

  When children become teenagers they begin to seek a separate identity. There is a lot going on during adolescence such as body changes, mastering peer relationships and defining educational expectations. As students across the country begin a new school year, it's an opportune time for teens to begin learning social skills, personal responsibility and accountability and respect for authority.  Whew.  That's a mouthful.
 The teen years are also a period of transition for parents, who move away from providing for each and every childhood need to coaching their teen how to manage their own needs and deal with the frustrations and demands of daily life. As the parent of a teenager, your new role is to help your teen learn how to set realistic goals and expectations for themselves and let them take the lead while you encourage and support them from the sidelines. In other words, start cutting the cord while keeping them in your range of vision, without them knowing.........................easier said than done.

. The following tips are offered by Ms DuPont to help parents minimize their involvement and allow teens to take the lead in maximizing their own educational experience.
Learning Style
People learn differently. Some learn from listening to lectures or reading, while others learn best with visual aids or hands-on projects. If a teacher's style doesn't match your teen's learning style, students can supplement learning by using flash cards or sketching diagrams to aid in memorizing new material.
When taking notes, it may be useful for your teen to draw a sketch of something that helps the information stick in their mind. During class, students should listen for key words or phrases the teacher emphasizes, write them down, and highlight them so they are easily recognizable when reviewing their notes. There are lots of learning styles; visual, tactile, kinetic, through hearing .........google the term and identify how your child learns.
Planning
It is important for teens to understand their homework assignments and write them in their phone notebook, daily planner or notepad. Include specific details about what is expected and the assignment due date.
If your teen devotes enough time to do good work, they'll have greater means to succeed. Estimating how much time is needed to read a book, write a paper or prepare for an exam will help your teen establish an effective study schedule.
Organization
Organizing study notes helps students find information quickly when preparing for exams. This can be accomplished with highlighters, colored pens and post-its. Flagging information while reading makes it easy to return to. Highlight or write important topics, phrases or terms in a new color pen so they stand out.

Nobody benefits from completing an assignment, but forgetting to turn it in. At this stage, teachers have little patience for the excuse, "I left my homework at home." After homework is finished, teens should put homework in their binder or backpack, and set it next to the door so they can grab it and go the next morning.

Communication
If your teen can develop a good relationship with each teacher, they'll feel more comfortable asking questions and clarifying expectations, even if they don't personally like the teacher. This is a good one. As a former teacher, students who made the effort to relate to me one- on -one were one step ahead of the aloof ones.
Study Space and Time
Some people prefer a quiet study environment while others benefit from listening to soft music. A comfortable study space should reflect the student's style, but it should also be free of distraction. Cell phones and social mediashould be off limits during study time.

Teens can optimize learning by getting adequate rest, taking breaks, and being physically and emotionally healthy. Establishing bedtime limits and a nightly routine of reading or listening to relaxing music prior to bed helps teens get the sleep they need.

Test prep involves more than just studying. Teens need to be rested, alert, calm, confident and comfortable. It is also important to learn how to manage the time given for an exam and allot a certain number of minutes to each section of the exam. 
Homework Habits
Instead of watching television or plugging in to the Internet upon arriving home from school,  use them as a reward for after homework has been completed. Consider establishing healthy homework habits such as:

• Homework is done immediately after school.
• If self-discipline is an issue, homework can be done in the kitchen or common areas instead of their room.
• All social media is off-limits until homework is finished. You can do it.  Be strong!!!
• Cell phone is only accessible when homework is finished.

Checking In
As the new school year begins, check in with your teen by asking what they think of their teachers and how they are feeling about the subjects they are studying. Once school is underway check in daily or weekly by asking about their assignments and what they are learning. It really does help to know progress, rather than be surprised when the report card comes and it is too late.  If there is a problem, teachers and counselors can help with tutoring available, study groups and additional tools to success. chrissie

What's For Dinner??

As teens become more independent in their food choices, they tend to make the wrong choices - even teens who were brought up eating healthy. Here are the four bad food habits teens have and more importantly, what to do about them:
 
Skipping breakfast is the leading bad food habit for teenagers. According to the American Dietetic Association, more than half of male teens and more than two-thirds of female teens do not eat breakfast on a regular basis. Your mother was right.  Breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Eating breakfast can upstart your teen's metabolism, which helps with weight control, mood and school performance.
You can ensure that your teen eats a healthy breakfast by making the foods readily accessible to him.  It is sometimes helpful to get all the prep done the night before.  Pancake batter, ready to go. Cantaloupe peeled and quartered. Cereal out and table set.  For late starts, a hard boiled egg and a cored apple- to- go are good for a quick hand-off.
 
The next unhealthy food habit teens have is increased foods from 'other' food group. Think of the food pyramid, the 'other' food group is the smallest smallest section at the top with what is supposed to be the least amount of servings. Teens tend to eat too much high fat and calorie snack foods that are categorized in the 'other' food group.
You can help teens break this habit by having fruits and healthy snacks available more often then having high fat and calorie snacks available. It is easier to grab a bag of chips at the grocery store then picking up a bag of oranges and remembering to wash and quarter.  It is worth the effort.  Carrots and celery in a tupperware container are easy to grab.There is cheese and whole wheat crackers.  Popcorn is always.popular and healthy to boot.  Get the fruit out of their plastic sacks, wash and arrange in a pretty bowl, and watch the contents disappear. Shaved turkey and whole wheat bread with lettuce and tomatoes is a much better choice than a fat filled pizza pocket.
 
Increased eating outside of the home is another bad food habit teens have. Teens hit the fast food restaurants much more often then they did when they were younger. This tends to be because of school, sports and work schedules overlapping regular meal times.
To circumvent this bad habit, talk to your teen about only eating less fast food.  Then make dinner and healthy food available to him when he has the time. This is another good excuse for sitting down as family and having dinner, no matter how inventive scheduling has to be.
 
Last, but not least, in this list of bad food habits is soft drink consumption. A study looking at American youths aged 6-17 found an increase in the prevalence of soft drink consumption from 37% in 1978 to 56% in 1998. You can help your teen choose a healthier drink by having fruit juice and water available and not buying soda. Or try fruit flavored carbonated water instead of soda. My teens really like these.

One common denominator for getting teens to eat healthier and avoid these bad food habits is an active role in providing healthy foods. When you get in the habit of making these foods more readily available to your teen, you will see a change in their eating habits. Eating habits that could last a lifetime. chrissie

All I Learned in Kindergarten

September is here and everyone is back in school.  When my children were small, getting back into the routine took a little while.  Earlier bedtimes, earlier mornings, schedules, homework- more structure and more expectations.  Getting back into the swing of it all was not easy.

When my last child graduated from high school, I thought those days were behind me.  No more sleepy heads. lunches to pack,  tennis gear to find.  Even more important,I did not have the angst and trepidation of a new school year.  All those unknowns.  The "good" teacher.  Acceptance by their peers.  Academic success.  Making the team.  Feeling good about themselves and their school experience. Over. Done.

Wrong.  My Mom school days are over but "Oh-Mommy" school days have taken their place. My grandchildren, Annebelle and Wagner certainly have involved parents.  That is an understatement.  Annie and Greg more assuredly need no help from anyone to raise their children. They are doing an outstanding job.  That said, I will share an example of my grandparenting.

Kindergarten is a big step.  You deposit this little soul into the care of another, and just walk away.  You have put 6 years of your life into this small child;  what he learns, what she sees, who they play with.  You know what they are passionate about, what they are afraid of, what makes them smile and what makes them cry.  You know this child because you love this child with all your heart.  And this is the child  you have just left in a little bitty chair, with his backpack and his lunchbox and a look of terror on his face. A parent has to turn on their heels, and with one goodbye, walk away.

I have assured my daughter that he will be fine.  It gets better.  They get used to the long day and the routine.  He will make new friends.  He will sort out the rules. (He says that is all they talk about)  He will not have to sit criss-cross applesauce all the time.  They will soon, very soon, get to play in the centers.  He will learn to eat his lunch before its time to go outside.

 So, off he marches, everyday, to get his education.

I talk a big story.  I know it is the truth.  But maybe, just maybe, around 11:30, a car slowly pulls into the street behind the playground.  The engine is turned off and the window is rolled down.  As the children pour onto the playground, one in particular is watched very carefully.  The little guy with with dinosaur on his shirt and back- to- school Nikes is spotted.  Just observed.  To see how he is doing.  On the playground. His first week of kindergarten.  Chrissie aka Oh-Mommy