Parent-Teen War -Eureka! Parents Win

Homecoming. For our generation it evokes pom pom corsages with pipe cleaner letters in the school colors, the bigger the better. Tissue paper class and club floats that everyone worked on all week, culminating with a big parade downtown. There was the Homecoming Queen and her court, riding around the track at half-time, waving gaily to all the fans. Homecoming brings back memories of fall and football and bonfires. Those dates to the Homecoming Dance. Ahhh. It was a simpler time. And a safer one.

The paper today issued a warning from the police to high- schoolers that the traditional Homecoming week of retaliation and destruction would not be tolerated. To the uninformed, this means a nightly attack against members of another class. Teachers knew it at MHS as the dreaded Junior- Senior War.

The "tradition" seemed to start when one group destroyed another group's float, probably about nine or ten years ago. There went the float tradition. An edict came from downtown that there would be no more floats for homecoming. Those few kids who made bad decisions affected this memorable and creative activity for the rest of our student body. Sound familiar?

So, no floats. No parades. If memory serves me right, eggs and toilet paper next became the week's activity. First years were on foot, a house by house assault. Kids roamed neighborhoods, Juniors against Seniors. The next morning property owner complaints poured in at the Ed Center and MHS. (How someone assumes non-sanctioned, non school activities are the responsibility of said organization in the first place is another column.)

Every year that I was there, The Junior - Senior War became more the focus and the most anticipated activity of Homecoming. That was all students were talking about, some in whispers, others with maps and computer print-outs. T-Shirts even appeared, claiming bragging rights and battle cries for the week. Administration warned, threatened and cajoled, unfortunately, only adding to the excitement, anticipation and danger.

Paint Ball Guns appeared somewhere in this time line. Paint Ball guns fired not only on foot, but from cars. We are now talking not only about damage to property. Paint Balls fired from moving cars cause accidents. Only last spring a talented young athlete from Jenks was killed when a paint ball war resulted in an auto accident. Not only will his family live forever with the loss, the lives of the other young men involved will never be the same.

In an earlier column, Mel discussed teen brains. It has been proven that their sometimes lack of common sense and feeling of immortality is a chemical process. "Gee, maybe this isn't such a good idea" often does not enter into the equation. Adrenalin, the herd instinct ( and often alcohol) override personal safety and respect for other's property. It's a rush to" make a hit" and drive off into the night, tires screeching and doors slamming. It is also destructive and dangerous.

Here's a suggestion. Parents win. Just Say No this year. Put your foot down. Absolutely forbid your child's participation in this warped form of entertainment. Lock up the paint ball guns. Tonight there is a Homecoming Festival at the school. Positive and dare I say, wholesome activities have been planned for your teen's enjoyment. Then, they come home. No vague, "I'll be over at Johnny's for a while"...know exactly what the game plan is. Tomorrow night, maybe join with another parent or two and offer a swimming party or bonfire. Thursday, if they have to throw eggs, offer a big field and let them have at it. Keep it contained and monitored. Be the parents of the class that breaks the pattern. Offer alternate activities but don't allow the old "It's a tradition" to weaken your resolve. Be firm parents! You can do it! Looking back, I wish I had.