Thursday, May 24, 2007

You Don't Want to Miss a Thing

Do you remember these Aerosmith lyrics:

I could stay lost in this moment... fff... forever
O'every moment spent with you
Is a moment I treasure
I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing....

The song came out near the time of my daughter's high school graduation, and, corny as it is, even then I knew the lyrics were bittersweet. Although written as a love song, it had managed to capture the way I had been feeling throughout her senior year.

Maybe I had been feeling it in the back of my mind since she was born. As a teacher, I had seen so many parents go through the emotionally charged weeks before graduation. I knew one part of a precious journey would ultimately be over and I didn't want to miss a thing. I'm sure I had already started missing her, though, long before the end of her senior year.

If you are the mother or father of a graduating senior and you haven't taken advantage of almost every opportunity to see your child perform, you are running out of time. Ultimately, you are running out of time, even if you have attended every single school function religiously. I know early on it seemed like there would be a never-ending list of football games, choir concerts, cheerleader try-outs, soccer games and tennis matches, academic assemblies and honor society initiations, band concerts, parades, coronations, basketball games, track meets, and Proms, but they do end, and once they're over, they're over for good - no going back. You have one more week to revel in the accomplishments of the most precious thing in your life, and you don't want to miss a thing.

You can make this week special for your senior by making a place of honor on your diningroom table just for him/her. Put his/her framed senior picture in the middle of the table. Put all the cards, gifts and good wishes that arrive on the table for everyone to see that other people hold your child in esteem. Display honor certificates, medals, awards, trophies, ropes, tassels, and other kudos prominenetly on the table as they are received throughout the week.

Don't forget your children's good friends, either. These people have stood by your child throughout high school, or for most people in Muskogee, since childhood. Congratulate them profusely and tell them how proud you are of them. Take every opportunity to cook for them or go out to eat with them - it is also one more opportunity to be with your child! Have a cook-out, pool party, or other reception for your child, family, and friends on graduation day, pre or post event.

Yes, life goes on after graduation, but not ever in the same way. As a teacher, I re-live the bittersweet part of the graduation experience over and over again. The biggest loss is knowing that these wonderful people with whom I have associated for the last four important years of their lives - seeing their educations culminate in college acceptance letters and scholarships - will never be in my life on a daily basis again. That is my very great loss.

I will miss almost everything in the rest of your children's lives - college graduations, weddings, first jobs, babies. To me they will remain those happy, innocent, eighteen-year-olds marching merrily, if not with some trepidation, into the rest of their lives. But, you still have time to watch them stride across the stage and on to future successes, and you really don't want to miss a thing.

No school Monday, May 28th - Memorial Day

MHS Graduation Friday, June 1st at Indian Bowl

You must have a ticket to attend - tickets will be passed out at graduation practices next week.

6 comments:

CallChuck said...

Carrie and Chrissie...

In addition to being an Aerosmith fan (mostly from the old days), your story touched me.

I'm the father of three (and Grandfather of three). Today's the last day of school for my two boys who are still in school. The oldest will be entering his Senior year in the fall and over the years I have seen many games and practices. However, I've also missed many games because of just what you mentioned - that is, the feeling that there will always be more games and events down the road. In fact I'll be missing a coaches showcase event this weekend in Colorado due to work.

Anyway - thanks for your reminder that time marches on and that eventually so do our kids. While I'm happy for them that they are growing personally, academically and athletically I also dread the day when they take their first real step outside the home - definitely bitter sweet.

Thanks again...CallChuck
www.MarathonDigitalMedia.com
Start Young. Play Strong.

Melony Carey and Chrissie Wagner said...

Thanks, Call Chuck, for those wise remarks. I really appreciate and completely agree with everything you said. Time marches on way too quickly, especially when all our lives are so full!! Enjoy your son's senior year - it will be October one minute and May the next!! Good luck to you and all your family.

Anonymous said...

I feel it ending, and yet I am also almost relieved to be out from under all the stress of having to go to all those school and co-curricular activities plus all the other things, dance recitals, hockey, soccer, tennis, riding - I am anxious to have my own life back! I am still doing it all, though, because I don't want to wake up one day and realize I missed it and I can't get it back.

Melony Carey and Chrissie Wagner said...

Graduating Mom - that's the best thing you could do! And, you will love having your life back! There really is life after having a teenager, full of fun possibilities, which include visiting your child in his new environment at college, also fun! Enjoy the days until you child graduates and best wishes to all!

Anonymous said...

I recently discovered a children's book entitled Let Me Hold You Longer authored by Karen Kingsbury. The message of the book was particularly sombering as it addressed the concept of experiencing your children's "lasts". As a parent, it's easy, and comfortable to recognize my child's first hair cut, first word spoken, first step taken. It's not so easy to recognize my children's last time needing help getting dressed, last time needing help being fed, or last time I carry them to bed.

Your post reminded of this book.

Melony Carey and Chrissie Wagner said...

J, what a wonderful book! I will look that up! You are right, we are so cognizant of firsts, but lasts escape us most of the time. Great observation!
Melony