It's official. My house is ready for Christmas. The lights are up on the house. The garland is on the mantel. The wreath is on the door. My house is happy and so am I.
What makes Christmas such an emotional time? People either love the holiday or hate it. It seems to depend on how our expectations were met as children. If the season was a stable and nurturing event in a life, Christmas is welcomed. If Christmas was an excuse for a dysfunctional family to get more so, adult children now become angry and depressed. Unfortunately, that attitude carries over into their own family and affects their own children.
I am not talking about how many presents are under the tree. I mean, harboring a resentment from long ago that directly impacts those loved most of all. Christmas is an opportunity to make those memories and traditions that are so important in our children's lives. Any time a family gathers together is a chance to mold the people our children will become. Carrying our own baggage into the dynamics is selfish and destructive. Make a conscious choice to at least be neutral- it's only fair.
The climate in a house is directly influenced by the care-givers who live there. Positive energy results in positive results. Grumpy and surly-the opposite.
I wish we "grownups" all had wonderful memories of our childhoods. Unfortunately, many of us were not so lucky. The key to me is to take the good and learn from the bad. Carrying it around like an albatross is counterproductive and more importantly, impacts generations of our families. It there is more than you can deal with alone- get professional help. Talk it out. Resolve. Forgive. Move on.
May this Christmas be a continuation of the good or a new start for you and yours. I wish you a joyful time with all those you love. Take a deep breath and put your big boy pants on. You can do this. Oh, and Merry Christmas! chrissie
18 comments:
easier said than done my friend-easier said than done.
My Father hated Christmas and made the holiday miserble for all of us. I start hyperventilating at thanksgiving and really have to work to not carry over all those old tapes in my own family and in my own home.
Bah hum.. When I stopped living in the problem and began working on and living in the solution....the problem(s) went away. Thank God there are some spiritual tools out there in a lot of shapes and sizes that will fit me. I guess it depends on my willingness to quit digging my hole(s)....God Bless you and Merry Christmas. This time of year can be full sharing, gratitude, joy, and giving of ourselves in many ways.
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